Leading with Fear Works!

Many of us learned how to lead with fear…and it works…sort of. Leading with fear comes with a price.Using fear as a motivation technique is sometimes effective, but the key to understanding the use of fear is that this method is not sustainable. When leaders and managers leverage fear in the workplace, it is important for them to understand that while it may move people immediately in the direction in which they want to go, it also immediately erodes trust.Know that when employees are motivated and moved by fear, employee movement continues both literally and figuratively. Employees start planning their escape. Literally, they escape by leaving the organization. Oops, there goes another one. We know the expense of employee turnover.Even more significant are the employees who escape figuratively…read “employee disengagement”. Employees disengage when they distrust. When people check out, they are not motivated, productive, or loyal. Think of the cost to your organization with a team who has checked out.Fear is not sustaining; in fact, fear is debilitating to an organization.We need to recognize that fear is the go-to method for many leaders and managers -- we learned it, cultivated it, and thought we perfected it. I challenge you to reconsider this technique due to the long-term destructive ramifications. Get your creative juices flowing for more innovative, value-centered, and love-based approaches to influence others.What are more effective techniques you use to motivate your team? Please share your comments below.As always, I love hearing your ideas.With love,MariaDr. Maria Church, CPC, is a leadership coach, speaker, and author of Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance and her upcoming book, A Course in Leadership: 21 Spiritual Lessons on Leadership, Love, and Life. Maria holds a doctorate of management in organizational leadership, teaches at several universities, and is CEO of Dr. Maria Church International LLC, a leadership coaching, development, and training firm. For more information, visit www.DrMariaChurch.com.

No More Denial

I got on the scale this morning and I am 26 pounds lighter – woohoo! With this experience, I’ve had a profound awakening.For several years I tried many diets and different ways to increase my will power.  I did so much self-talk about the virtues of denying myself all of the foods that were “bad” for me.And you can probably guess the outcome…no success with weight loss.The Aha! moment came when I unexpectedly saw myself in an elevator mirror and did not recognize the woman looking back.  Now I’ve looked in the mirror many times and was not crazy about what I saw, but this time was different.  This time, it was not disgust; it was unconditional, overwhelming love.That was the shift. I loved myself more than the fear of lack or the fear of denying myself the foods I thought I wanted.I desired self-love more than I wanted a cupcake.I desired health more than I wanted potato chips.I desired wellness more than I wanted chocolate.The desire for what I wanted weighed more than the fear of denial.Whenever we can shift the scale (no pun intended) for love instead of fear…miracles happen.What do you fear more than you love? Shift your focus and watch for miracles.With love,MariaDr. Maria Church, CPC, is a leadership coach, speaker, and author of Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance and her upcoming book, A Course in Leadership: 21 Spiritual Lessons on Leadership, Love, and Life. Maria holds a doctorate of management in organizational leadership, teaches at several universities, and is CEO of Dr. Maria Church International LLC, a leadership coaching, development, and training firm. For more information, visit www.DrMariaChurch.com.

From Chaos to Order

We are in the home stretch of this year, looking to complete the goals we set. Clearing the clutter from our space will support us in the last quarter stretch, taking us from chaos to order.Below are 7 simple steps my friend Dr. Dorothy Bonvillain and I came up with based on Gail Blanke’s book, Throw Out Fifty Things[1], to guide you as you move from room to room. You can use these same steps in your home, office, car, and any other space in which you spend time.

  1. Label each of your 5 boxes or bags:
    1. Donate
    2. Trash
    3. Sell
    4. Move to another room
    5. Unsure (only one box)
  2. Remember the rules of engagement:
    1. If you makes you feel bad, toss it
    2. If it adds nothing positive, toss it
    3. If you have to think about it too hard, toss it
    4. No room for fear, toss it
  3. Set a timer to one hour before you plan to stop, and stick to it!
  4. As you go through each space, put items in the appropriate container:
    • Donate. Many items that you donate may be a tax write-off.  Be sure to list everything you are donating and get a receipt from the charitable organization.  Be sure to check with your tax advisor on specifics.
    • Trash. Throw away those items that cannot be donated or sold.  Come on, you know those items when you see them – the single sock cannot be sold at the Salvation Army and no one is going to buy it for a rag!
    • Sell. These items may be sold in a variety of ways, depending on their value.  Yard sales, consignment shops, Ebay, and Craig’s List are some of the most popular ways to sell perfectly good items to someone else.
    • Move to another room. Don’t stop your momentum to take items to their appropriate room.  Put them in this container and use the last hour you committed to this process to relocate those items.
    • Unsure.  Only ONE box per room for this one!  These are items that you are truly torn about what to do.  The rules are very specific for this one:
      • One box per room.
      • Label the box with a date six months from now.
      • On that date, go through this same process and see what you can donate, trash, or sell.
  5. Use gallon zip storage and sandwich bags to hold and organize small items such as jewelry, makeup, screws, rubber bands, paper clips, etc.
  6. As you go through your spaces, “To Do” items are going to come up for you.  Write these items down so you can act on them after your timer is done.  Don’t let anything distract your momentum.
  7. Make the process and event, a celebration.  Turn on some music that energizes you, and celebrate the transition from the old to the new, un-cluttered space.

Congratulations on clearing your space and keeping your eye on the prize!With love,MariaDr. Maria Church, CPC, is a leadership coach, speaker, and author of Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance and her upcoming book, A Course in Leadership: 21 Spiritual Lessons on Leadership, Love, and Life. Maria holds a doctorate of management in organizational leadership, teaches at several universities, and is CEO of Dr. Maria Church International LLC, a leadership coaching, development, and training firm. For more information, visit www.DrMariaChurch.com.


[1] Blanke, G. (2009). Throw out fifty things: Clear the clutter, find your life. New York, NY: Grand Central Life & Style.

Clutter Stress

This is the time of year when we go through our closets, files, and other places that tend to get cluttered throughout the year. Perhaps this de-cluttering ritual exists to prepare ourselves for the holidays and many more guests in our home. In any case, it is always so freeing to go through the ritual of de-cluttering and taking back our space.When we are surrounded with clutter, our stress levels increase making it more difficult to stay alert and committed to our goals and tasks. Clearing is so helpful for us to stay focused on our work and reaching our goals in the home stretch of this year. It gives us the white space literally and figuratively to work with clarity and without distraction.In today’s blog, I want to share with you a book that has helped me tremendously with this process. The book, Throw Out Fifty Things[1], author Gail Blanke suggests Four Rules of Disengagement.  I like the simplicity of her rules and have simplified them even more!  These four rules are a powerful guideline for un-cluttering.Rules of Engagement:

  1. How you feel: If the stuff in your space hinders movement, makes you feel bad, feels like it weighs you down, is in the way of getting to something, get rid of it.
  2. Addition factor: If the stuff just sits there adding nothing to your life, saps your energy, does not give you joy, get rid of it.  Remember that standing still is not really static, while everything or everyone around you moves forward, standing still is just another way of moving backward.  Get rid of the negative to make room for the positive.
  3. KISS principle – Keep It Simple Silly:  There is no reason to make these keep or toss decisions complicated.  If you have to think about keeping or tossing too long, get rid of it.
  4. Kick fear to the door:  You are reclaiming your time, creativity, and productivity.  You are reclaiming your life!  This is not a dress rehearsal, this is it, your time, your life.  You can’t afford not to un-clutter.  As Nike has taught us, Just Do It!

In Thursday’s blog I’ll share with you 7 steps to guide you as you move from room to room. Good luck!With love,Maria

Dr. Maria Church, CPC, is a leadership coach, speaker, and author of Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance and her upcoming book, A Course in Leadership: 21 Spiritual Lessons on Leadership, Love, and Life. Maria holds a doctorate of management in organizational leadership, teaches at several universities, and is CEO of Dr. Maria Church International LLC, a leadership coaching, development, and training firm. For more information, visit www.DrMariaChurch.com.
[1] Blanke, G. (2009). Throw out fifty things: Clear the clutter, find your life. New York, NY: Grand Central Life & Style.

Where Did the Time Go?

We are deep into the fall season and closing in on Halloween. Thanksgiving is just around the corner, kicking off the holiday season. So many joyful ceremonies, practices, and events fill the season with activity. The challenge for some of us is how easily time slips away during this very active time of year.You may want to consider a pause now, to refocus, plan, and strategize how you are going to enjoy this active season and still accomplish what you want. Be cautious and aware that activity does not necessarily mean productivity. We can easily busy ourselves with the actions of web surfing, shopping, and internet chatting. The illusion that accompanies this busy action is that we’ve been “working”. With awareness, you can guarantee this will not happen to you.A few simple steps can help you maintain you focus and accomplish what you set out to do:

  • Turn off your email notifications and only check it at scheduled times throughout the day.
  • If you enjoy social media, save it for the end of the day like a reward for staying focused.
  • Put your phone on “Do not disturb” when you are working on a task that requires your 100% attention.
  • Close your door for un-interrupted time each day so those around you know not to disturb you during those times.
  • Move your desk so it is not facing the door.
  • If people have a tendency to park themselves in the chairs in your office, remove the chairs and only bring them in for meetings.
  • Unclutter your mind by purging “to do’s” onto paper.

These very simple steps will help you focus with greater ease.What are some strategies you do to maintain your focus? I am sure we all would love to know!With love,MariaDr. Maria Church, CPC, is a leadership coach, speaker, and author of Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance and her upcoming book, A Course in Leadership: 21 Spiritual Lessons on Leadership, Love, and Life. Maria holds a doctorate of management in organizational leadership, teaches at several universities, and is CEO of Dr. Maria Church International LLC, a leadership coaching, development, and training firm. For more information, visit www.DrMariaChurch.com.

Lead Without Being Bossy

I often come across leaders who want to be strong leaders but don’t want to be bossy. Many of the leadership models and examples they’ve experienced are aggressive, pushy, and downright nasty…and they don’t want to be like that!Yet, this same group of people doesn’t want to be “weak” or considered pushovers. They don’t see strong leaders being taken advantage of, not listened to, or not respected.Well the great news is that you don’t need to lead at either end to be a great leader.Strong, powerful leaders all have something in common and it doesn’t hurt or require you to do something super-human.Follow these seven practices and you’ll be leading without being bossy in no time:

  • Ask questions before you talk. Find out what your team needs.
  • Listen, really listen to their responses.
  • Get dirty. Don’t ask your team to do anything that you would not do.
  • Walk the talk. Maintain your integrity and do what you say you are going to do.
  • Take responsibility for yourself and your team. When you honor them, they will honor you.
  • Care about your people, individually and collectively. Remember that actions speak louder than words.
  • Don’t rely on unspoken expectation. Be very clear what is expected of your team and of you.
  • Invite people to participate rather than telling. Rarely, if ever, will your team decline the “invitation”. If you are following these principles, your team will not only accept the invitation, they will probably follow you wherever you go!

What else would you add to this list of being a great leader without being bossy? As always, I love hearing from you.With love,MariaDr. Maria Church, CPC, is a leadership coach, speaker, and author of Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance and her upcoming book, A Course in Leadership: 21 Spiritual Lessons on Leadership, Love, and Life. Maria holds a doctorate of management in organizational leadership, teaches at several universities, and is CEO of Dr. Maria Church International LLC, a leadership coaching, development, and training firm. For more information, visit www.DrMariaChurch.com.

Analysis Paralysis

In my corporate career, I saw many afflicted with analysis paralysis. In our “show me” culture, we want to see empirical proof of everything. If you can substantiate something on an Excel spreadsheet, you gain instant credibility.Historically, ever since we entered the Science Age, we’ve not really given anything much significance or credibility unless we could “prove” it.The prove it mantra has served us well in some respects, especially for the skeptics, but this practice has also stifled us. When we only rely on evidence and proof, we may overlook something even more powerful. Our insight and intuition is also proof—only it is intangible. We know something to be real or true, sometimes with an even stronger compelling feeling than the physical evidence that is in front of us. So why do some of us become paralyzed and in the cycle of evidence and analysis?Fear.Fear is what keeps us paralyzed. We want more proof, more analysis, and more evidence to substantiate our decision. If we are afraid to make a decision, then we want even more analysis and proof. This paralysis causes us to miss opportunities in our business, organization, and life.When you feel yourself wanting more and more proof, stop and get serious about some reflection and stillness.It is time to move into action. Do your due diligences, your homework, tap into your insight, and stop long enough to listen to your intuition—then move into action.With love,MariaDr. Maria Church, CPC, is a leadership coach, speaker, and author of Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance and her upcoming book, A Course in Leadership: 21 Spiritual Lessons on Leadership, Love, and Life. Maria holds a doctorate of management in organizational leadership, teaches at several universities, and is CEO of Dr. Maria Church International LLC, a leadership coaching, development, and training firm. For more information, visit www.DrMariaChurch.com. 

What’s on Your Plate?

Sometimes we find that we have too much on our plates. Okay, that can be both literal and figurative. When we have too much on our plates literally, we experiences unhealthy consequences such as weight gain, high blood pressure, heart disease, and more.When we have too much on our plates figuratively we become overwhelmed and stressed and we suffer unhealthy consequences such as weight gain, high blood pressure, heart disease, and more. Deja vu!As we move into the fourth quarter of the year, it is a good time for us to look at our plates and see what’s there.The following exercise is one I do with my clients and is very helpful to take a good hard look at what’s on your plate:

  1. First, section your plate into eight different sections:• Spiritual• Work/career• Personal growth• Family• Financial• Living environment• Community/volunteer• Health/wellness
  2. Next, identify challenges or issues from the sections of your plate.
  3. Finally, review each section of the plate and answer the following questions:• What can come off my plate?• Where can I take control and shift some of the responsibilities?• Pay close attention to your feelings as you complete this exercise. Do you feel resistance in an area, relief, or something else?

When you complete the exercise, commit to at least one change on your plate per week between now and the end of the month. Remember, it takes at least 21 days to set a new habit.Good luck and let me know how it goes!With love,MariaDr. Maria Church, CPC, is a leadership coach, speaker, and author of Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance and her upcoming book, A Course in Leadership: 21 Spiritual Lessons on Leadership, Love, and Life. Maria holds a doctorate of management in organizational leadership, teaches at several universities, and is CEO of Dr. Maria Church International LLC, a leadership coaching, development, and training firm. For more information, visit www.DrMariaChurch.com.

Imagine Leading in Peace

Imagine all the peopleLiving life in peaceYou may say that I'm a dreamerBut I'm not the only oneI hope someday you'll join usAnd the world will be as one. - John LennonYesterday would have been John Lennon’s 73rd birthday.When I look at lyrics from his famous song, Imagine, I am struck by the simplicity of his statements and the call to action. Living life in peace is possible in our world, our countries, our communities, our organizations, and our families. Peace begins with us, and feeling peaceful within ourselves. Of course, our internal peace is steeped in self-love.Feeling peaceful in our workplaces is sometimes challenging, but not impossible. To shift to peace, requires awareness and a commitment to live life in peace. Envision who you would be living and leading your life in peace and hold that vision until it becomes reality.Yes, it is true…I am a dreamer, but I’m not the only one. I hope someday you’ll join us.With love while holding the dream,MariaDr. Maria Church, CPC, is a leadership coach, speaker, and author of Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance and her upcoming book, A Course in Leadership: 21 Spiritual Lessons on Leadership, Love, and Life. Maria holds a doctorate of management in organizational leadership, teaches at several universities, and is CEO of Dr. Maria Church International LLC, a leadership coaching, development, and training firm. For more information, visit www.DrMariaChurch.com.

Bring on Resistance?

I just watched an interview by Oprah with writer, Steven Pressfield. A thought struck me during this interview and I had one of those “Aha!” moments. Pressfield wrote in his book, The War of Art, “Most of us have two lives. The life we live, and the unlived life within us. Between the two stands Resistance”.I felt a pang in my heart when I heard this. Was the pang for the unlived life or a deep knowing that resistance still plays a role in my life?Perhaps both.What I love about Pressfield’s teaching on resistance is his explanation that resistance is a force of in nature, a natural occurrence that exists when we have movement or action. The key is to recognize this as something that will happen as we evolve and grow; that it is not us (even though it takes form in our thoughts) and that we just need to push through resistance. One such way to push through resistance is meditation. Meditation can actually bring us up above the resistance, like a hurdle jumper on a track. The runner does not stop and turn back with a hurdle—she jumps over it. Meditation allows us to jump over resistance.The other aspect about this understanding of resistance is the positive side of resistance. Resistance can be a beautiful affirmation that we are moving closer to action, movement, and creating something significant. If we are not feeling some resistance, we are not growing and expanding. Woohoo – bring it on!As always, I love hearing your thoughts. What are you resisting and why?Without resistance or hesitation,MariaContent copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

Have You Shed today?

“We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us. The old skin has to be shed before the new one can come.” - Joseph CampbellI read this quote today and it struck me on several levels.First, I think that many of us are afraid to change or “get rid of” our current life, even if our current life is not serving us well. We are fearful of the unfamiliar and even if the current situation is unhealthy, dysfunctional, or negative, it is familiar – and that familiarity is enough to keep people stuck and paralyzed.Then I started thinking about the “old skin” and how this is such a beautiful metaphor of how we cover ourselves with a skin, mask, or armor. You know the old skin…it is the stories we tell and believe that keeps us stuck. The skin is also a mask that we sometimes hide behind, so we don’t really have to show up. The skin is also armor we put on to “protect” us from being hurt. The problem with armor is that nothing can penetrate from either direction, meaning we cannot send out love, compassion, or joy.While Joseph Campbell may have been referring to radical change, this rich quote is also applicable to small changes. Like I often tell my clients, sometimes only a minor shift or course correction is necessary. A ten-degree shift may be all we need to shed our old skin and start living the life waiting for us.What are you waiting for?With love,MariaContent copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

Goals, Goals, and More Goals

Goal-setting will not only get you to a successful place, it is an absolutely necessary ingredient on the road to success. Setting goals may seem like a daunting task, but with a process or system to guide you, it can be quite simple.One of my favorite books, “Eat That Frog” by Brian Tracy offers such a process. Follow these seven steps for goal setting and you will find yourself on the road to success:

  1. Decide exactly what you want. Spend the time necessary to get very clear about what you want as an outcome.
  2. Write it down. The simple act of writing your goals on paper gives you a tangible form to remind you of your goals. I like to post my goals so I see them frequently throughout the day.
  3. Set a deadline on your goal; set sub-deadlines if necessary. This step helps you stay accountable.
  4. Make a list of everything that you can think of that you are going to have to do to achieve your goal. This act gives you mental “white space” so you can focus.
  5. Organize the list into a plan. You can organize your list by priority and sequence.
  6. Take action on your plan immediately! Do something – do anything because without action, you just have a really pretty plan.
  7. Resolve to do something every single day that moves you toward your major goal. Put time on your calendar each day to do a specific task on your list to reach your goals and commit to that time.

That’s it! You are on your way to goal setting, and even more importantly, goal achieving.

With love,
Maria

Content copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

Is it Freezing in Here?

I just got back from visiting a friend of mine that I worked with many years ago. He described an all too familiar phenomenon happening in organizations all across America. People are retiring and leaving organizations and they are not being replaced. Hiring freezes is a common practice in companies to maintain a shrinking budget and avoid layoffs. This can be an effective strategy, but the down side is the compounded strain the hiring freeze puts on the existing employees whose workloads are now doubled or even tripled.

Most people are willing to pitch in and pick up the slack – for a variety of reasons such as pride in product or service, loyalty to the company, the “roll-up the sleeves” American spirit, or other intrinsic and extrinsic motivators. These motivating factors are what make hiring freezes viable temporary options. Note the key word here is temporary.

The phenomenon happening today all across America is this “temporary” hiring freeze , no raises, and in many cases pay cuts is now going on 4 to 5 years and our people are FROZEN! They are numb and disillusioned from the cold, aloof ways they are being treated. They are told that they are “lucky” to have jobs and people are walking hallways like zombies.

The connection, enthusiasm, and engagement of the early days of the freeze have worn off and their hearts and heads are no longer connected in the workplace.

Why is this a problem?

When our hearts and heads are not connected, we are not present, not engaged, and far from productive.

How can we thaw out our people? Try the most bold, priceless action in the world – tell them “Thank You”. Gratitude and appreciation immediately connect us to the present moment and instantly connects our head and heart, melting away the frigid temperatures of yesterday.

What are some creative ways you tell your team “thank you”? I love sharing your insight.

With love and warmth,
Maria

Content copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

Accountability is SIMPLE

As leaders, seizing opportunities to develop our team is a smart leadership practice. One of the best ways to develop our people is to hold them accountable.

Somehow we’ve managed to complicate the idea of holding people accountable, and it is quite simple. My friend Dr. Dorothy Bonvillain and I created an acronym to help you remember how simple delegating can be, with the acronym, SIMPLE:

S = Set clear expectations – this is the number one complaint and stressors from employees – that the expectations are vague.
I = Invite commitment – some say gain “buy in” but I much prefer to invite commitment. With an invitation, there is a shared sense of ownership.
M = Measure progress – Super important to keep up on this. How you will measure is part of the description of setting clear expectations.
P = Provide feedback – again, super important. Far too often managers will wait until the project is finished to say that it isn’t done correctly.
L = Link to consequences – consequences are also identified in the setting clear expectations stage.
E = Evaluate effectiveness – Do this together and it becomes a powerful activity for you and the person who is accountable.

What are some techniques you use to hold people accountable and why do you think the strategies are effective?

As always, I love sharing your insight.

With love,
Maria

Content copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

Strategic Planning

I am facilitating a strategic planning retreat today for an organization going through major change. As I prepared the agenda and activities, I was reminded how important this activity is to the success of realizing our vision and our intentions as a leader.

I know that the very thought of strategic planning makes some people bristle as they feel like they do not want the "constraints" of a strategic plan as they are “free spirits” or see the word “strategy” as cold, rigid, and not creative.

Not true! Completing a strategic planning process and designing your way to get there involves a lot of creativity and right-brain activity. Then the left-brain functions of determining the plans, steps, and strategies are added in to support the vision. Strategic planning is visioning, intending, and finding ways to support the vision.

Like so many other leadership functions, strategic planning has become much too complicated in some circles. You know me, I like to keep it simple, and my approach to strategic planning is also streamlined. Follow these simple steps and you will soar right through your strategic plan: 

  1. Assess where you are right now. Review your mission and values statement to confirm they are congruent with each other. Complete a SWOT analysis (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats).
  2. Get clear on your vision, where you want to go. Look at your vision statement and confirm the congruency with your vision, mission, and values. Set your long-term goals and your short-term goals all in support of your vision.
  3. Create your action plan to get you to your goals. See my blog post on Action Planning for steps to creating an action plan.

That’s it, go forth, and plan!

What are some techniques you’ve used for your strategic planning?

With love,
Maria

Content copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

LoveFest 2013

I am so excited to share with my latest project with you – LoveFest 2013!

Along with Laura Wilson, CPC, (Love Coach Laura), we are honoring 11 other people who integrate love into their work in BIG ways!

This FREE virtual event, LoveFest 2013, next week, September 16 – 19 demonstrates the exciting transformational shift from fear and competition modalities toward love and collaboration with heart-based methods.

Our speakers represent thirteen major areas of life (politics, leadership, business, money, health, sports, community, relationships, self, intention, networking, social media, sales, and education) experiencing the profound benefits of shifting to a love-based approach.

You will hear from money and business expert, Maria Simone, sales expert Carolyn Coradeschi, social media and marketing coach, Tassey Russo, the go to business coach for healers, Karen Monteverdi, bullying prevention expert, Vicki Abadesco, and several other experts bringing love to work in corporate America, communities, schools, business, health/wellness, weight loss, making money, sports, arts, and of course, relationships.

Not only will you hear 13 of us talk about this shift from fear to love, but you will hear about the incredible results that we and our clients are experiencing from this shift!

I sure do hope you will join us at our FREE virtual event, LoveFest 2013. Just click here to register!

Don’t miss Jone Bosworth, J.D.’s interview, “Unchain the Heart of Democracy”, or Sandy Zeldes’s interview, “Love: Your Weight-Loss Solution” and so much more!

Join us today!

Register at http://www.LoveFest2013.com

“See you” at the Fest!

With love,
Maria

Content copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

Have You Stretched Today?

The other morning, as I was coming into consciousness, I stretched my leg out, in a full stretch like a cat. Ouch! I pulled my muscle and got a cramp that made my calf feel like it was solid cement!

Now each morning, I am more conscious of how I stretch my muscles, and make sure I move about a bit before I have a full on stretch. I work out nearly every day and know the importance of stretching after my muscles are warmed up.

This got me thinking…how important the warm up is and how the deep stretches shouldn't happen until the body is warmed up and worked out.

This simple lesson can be applied to leadership and life.

When we jump in before we we’ve warmed up, we pull a muscle and experience pain. Leadership development is the warm up. 

If we put a title of “leader” on someone and expect that with the title comes the knowledge, skill set, and confidence to lead is setting one up for failure. They may not have the warm up but are expected to do the deep stretching that is required with leadership.

Great athletes never do the deep stretch until they are warmed up, and they always do the deep stretch after they work out.

Truly great leaders never stop learning and never stop developing…they are ready for the deep stretch.

How have you warmed up today?

With love,
Maria

Content copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

Shiny Object Syndrome

I sometimes find it easy to lose focus and become distracted — the shiny object syndrome.

Working with a client yesterday, she posed the question, “How do I move past the I won’t and/or I can’t thoughts to the I will intentions?

What a great question! I love the level of awareness required to recognize that our thoughts become our intentions – whether those thoughts serve and support us or derail and limit us. Our thoughts become our intentions and those intentions really do become our reality.

Bravo, for recognizing that simple, yet profound truth!

Here is a very simple three-step quickening exercise you can do to move your thoughts and actions from “I won’t/I can’t” to “I will”:

  1. Set your intention or goal as simply and distinctly as possible.
  2. When something comes up (a shiny object), just simply ask yourself, “Does this support my intention or goal?”
  3. If the answer is yes, move forward. If the answer is no, dismiss it and get back to I will so you can realize your intention and goal.

Really, it is that simple; however, I must warn you—the results you will experience will be profound!

With love,
Maria

Content copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

Your Way Out of Conflict

Like presence, when we fully connect with those with whom we are communicating, when we find common ground, we come together. Our ability to find common ground is easy when you combine presence, power listening, and perception shifting, with intuition.

Discover shared values, shared objectives, shared goals, and/or a shared vision. You are now on your way to discovering the true issue of the conflict. This clarity creates a shifted environment to now empathize with this person, which will move you into a collaborative vibe.

Once you’ve determined the true issue, now together, you can create a shared vision of collaboration…a plan to move forward. Remember as you create your plan of collaboration, apply the four actions of presence, power listening, perception shifting, and intuition, while always staying focused on common ground.

When you create your plan of collaboratively moving forward, remember to include follow-up, keeping the lines of communication open, demonstrating your commitment to improvement, and always be gracious—thanking the person for bringing this issue to your attention. Shoot for always ending the conversation on a positive note.

With love,
Maria

Content copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.

The Beauty of Complaints

So often, when we hear the word, complain, those of us who have worked in customer service bristle! However, complaints are not always a bad thing – sometimes complaints can be quite valuable. When we shift our perceptions from negativity to a positive frame, we may actually welcome complaints…well, sometimes!

Complaints can be beneficial because: 

  1. Complaints can give you information you may not otherwise have. Sometimes we can’t see the forest through the trees, in other words, we may be too close to the situation to see problems or issues.
  2. When we receive complaints, we receive information. Let’s face it; often times some information is better than no information. When people take the time out to complain, that means at some level they care! If they were complacent or indifferent about you or your organization, they would say nothing.
  3. If the complaint doesn’t come to you, it doesn’t mean the complaint is not being shared with someone else…perhaps shared with someone else with whom they are now doing business!
  4. The complaint gives you an opportunity to correct the situation. Contrary to popular belief, ignorance is not bliss.

Think about this: When people do share a complaint with you, they are actually saying:
 

  • I value this relationship.
  • I hope to continue this relationship.
  • I am presenting this problem to you because I care. 
  • I know you can fix this.

What are you thoughts about complaints?

With love,
Maria

Content copyright 2012. Dr. Maria J. Church. All rights reserved.