De-Compartmentalized Leading and Living

August 15, 2013 DrMaria

When we neglect to look at the whole person, especially the spiritual dimension, we overlook a strong and powerful resource. Our spirituality grows in wisdom, and it is in wisdom that the world’s most powerful resource is used. “Life and livelihood ought not be separated, but to flow from the same source, which is Spirit, for both life and livelihood are about Spirit. Spirit means life, and both life and livelihood are about living in depth, living with meaning, purpose, joy, and a sense of contribution to the greater community. A spirituality of work is about bringing life and livelihood back together again. And spirit with them.”1

We cannot compartmentalize our spirit; it is like compartmentalizing our breathing from our brain: impossible. In a study of spirituality in the workplace, Mitroff and Denton found that, “People do not want to compartmentalize or fragment their lives. The search for meaning, purpose, wholeness, and integration is a constant never-ending task. To confine this search to one day a week or after hours violates people’s basic sense of integrity, of being whole persons. In short, soul is not something one leaves at home.”2

How have you managed to de-compartmentalize your life?
Love,
Maria

1. Matthew Fox, The Reinvention of Work, pp. 1-2.
2. Ian I. Mitroff and Elizabeth A. Denton, A Spiritual Audit of Corporate America (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1999), pp. xv-xvi.

Leadership Choices Today are Tomorrow’s Results

August 13, 2013 DrMaria

“Yesterday was the birth of today. Today is the birthplace of tomorrow.” ~ Marvin Gaye

Marvin Gaye spoke those words at the Motown 25th Reunion show that aired on television in 1983. Simple words with a profound message.

Today, many of our organizations are spiritually bankrupt, halls walked by zombies, the living dead. The grim reaper has become the human resources director handing out yet another layoff notice, or the boss giving you yet another task because someone else has left the company. Too many organizations discourage deeper forms of communication, emotions, and intimacy, opting instead for superficiality.

If we continue down this path, the same path that got us here, we are doomed to fail. Boleman and Deal stated in Leading with Soul, “Spiritual bankruptcy ultimately leads to economic failure. The deeper cost is creating a world in which everything has a function yet nothing has any meaning.”

Life gives us many opportunities to learn lessons and if we fail to learn them the first time, we get the opportunity to experience the lessons again and again until we learn them. George Bernard Shaw wrote, “Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.” If we want progress, abundance, and new way of life then, we must as Gandhi stated, “Be the change we wish to see in the world.” Instead of following a path full of limitations, let’s construct a path illuminated with choice and abundance.

Are you in?

With love,
Maria

LUV and Manufacturing

August 6, 2013 DrMaria

Two of my favorite examples of Love-Based Leadership (LBL) in action include Southwest Airlines and Semco.

Southwest Airlines has demonstrated repeatedly that a holistic, loving focus (they are the “LUV” airline!) has brought abundance and meaning to their leaders and employees. They learned that when employees are trusted to make decisions, and when they have ownership of their work, they often come up with better solutions than those the company could have found. They responded much quicker to customers’ demands and the employees directed their energy toward innovation, seizing unique and creative market opportunities at critical times. “The Southwest story demonstrates over and over that people will act responsibly and do more than expected when they are given the freedom to think on their own.”1

The manufacturing company, Semco, demonstrated great love for their employees with the change from the traditional models of doing business to an organizational culture that honored and respected their people. As Ricardo Semler, CEO put it, “To survive in modern times, a company must have an organizational structure that accepts change as it basic premise, lets tribal customs thrive, and fosters a power that is derived from respect, not rules. In other words, the successful companies will be the ones that put quality of life first. Do this and the rest—quality of product, productivity of workers, profits for all—will follow.”2

What LBL organizations do you know of and how do they demonstrate LBL?

With love,
Maria

1. Freiberg, Kevin, and Jackie Freiberg. Nuts! Southwest Airlines’ Crazy Recipe for Business and Personal Success. New York: Broadway Books, 1998.
2.0Semler, Ricardo. Maverick: The Success Story Behind the World’s Most Unusual Workplace. New York: Warner Books, 1993.

Fear-Based Leadership Vision Statement

August 1, 2013 DrMaria

Fear-based leadership exists, but can easily be erased.

Remember that both fear and love cannot be present at the same time.

Love-Based Leadership (LBL) doesn’t look like fear, doesn’t smell like fear, and doesn’t walk like fear. Perfect love drives out all fear. LBL doesn’t just proclaim that people are important because it says so on the mission statement posted on the wall. LBL leaders do not say one thing and do another.

An organization where LBL is not practiced is secretive: a fertile ground for non-truth. An organization without LBL is steeped in office politics and scarcity thinking—the fear that resources are limited and everyone is out to get yours. Information is not shared, rather, it is hoarded. There is no sign of spirit or energy.

The focus and vision of organizations where LBL is not practiced (a fear-based organization) could read:

We recognize there is only a limited amount of (money, people, projects, resources) and we will do anything to make sure we’ve got most, if not all of it (money, people, etc.). We tell our people they are important and they believe us because they are incapable of making any decisions on their own. We are the best because we said so.

What do you think a Love-Based Leadership vision statement would say?

As always, I love hearing your perspective.

With love,
Maria

Wakeup Call!

July 30, 2013 DrMaria

When sleeping women wake, mountains move. ~ Chinese proverb

I love the power of this statement. I would like to expand it to read, “When sleeping people wake, mountains move.”

The most obvious interpretation of this is when we get into our day with focused attention; we get a lot of work done.

But ahhh, as we know, Chinese proverbs go much deeper, and so do I, so let’s get right to it!

When we “wake up” from unconsciousness, we move obstacles and barriers to love – also known as fear and ego. Our fear and ego sometimes feels like mountains. The only way to “move” the mountains is to eliminate the fear and ego with the supreme power of love.

We can only know the truth of love with consciousness.

It is time to set the alarm – this is a wakeup call! Good morning mountain movers.

What practices do you do to stay “awake” and conscious? I always love to hear from you and sharing your insight.

With love from your fellow mountain mover,
Maria

Prayer, Meditation and Leadership?

July 16, 2013 DrMaria

What in the world, do these three things have in common?

Everything.

As leaders, we have a responsibility to lead and inspire with clarity. In our busy world, we often don’t take the time to just think and get really clear about the vision and more importantly, the path, systems, and steps necessary to realize the vision.

And even worse, we think we have to get there on our own.

Well, the good news is that we are not on our own.

Prayer and meditation are ways we connect with our Source. Stillness and silence are also paths to feeling that connection with the Universe. French philosopher and scientist Blaise Pascal stated, “All man’s miseries derive from not being able to sit quietly in a room alone.”

Through stillness, we obtain clarity. When we have clarity, we have time gained. Time gained comes to us because we have a clearer picture of the problem or dilemma and see an unobstructed path to follow.

I cannot think of a more cost efficient use of time. The return on investment with time spent in silence with our Source is abundance beyond our wildest dreams.

As always, I love hearing your thoughts.

With love,
Maria

The Bull S#%T About Power

July 2, 2013 DrMaria

Let’s break open the lid on the belief that power must be kept tightly in order to be effective – BULL S#%T!

Power, like abundance and love, multiplies when you give it away.

That is why I cannot understand why leaders are so afraid to share power and empower others.

Power multiples when you give it away – really!

Boleman and Deal wrote in Leading with Soul, “When people have a sense of efficacy and an ability to influence their world, they usually seek to be more productive. They direct their energy and intelligence toward making a contribution rather than obstructing progress or destroying their enemies.” At Saturn automobile factories, employees are empowered to stop the assembly line any time they see something wrong. The employees have pride and ownership in their product and they are the quality control.

Another benefit of shared power is the reduction in conflict. We often suppress our feelings when we feel powerless. When this happens, our anger can only be contained for so long, then the conflict and anger comes spewing out, often times in a rage. Empowered people empower others. In a Love-Based Leadership organization, shared power equals shared ownership. You cannot have one without the other.

Have you empowered someone today? If not, what is holding you back?

With love,
Maria

Change What?!

June 18, 2013 DrMaria

Sometimes when I start working with new clients they are afraid that I am going to change them or that they have to change who they are to be better leaders. The reality is—to be the best leader you can be, you must be authentic.

Authenticity is what attracts followers and speaks to people’s heads as well as their hearts.

In coaching, we set goals for directions in which we want to move. We identify roadblocks or barriers that keep us from the movement we desire and create strategy to overcome those barriers.

Oftentimes those strategies may include a course correction in the path we already started. We may uncover some limiting beliefs we have about others or ourselves that may be holding us back. When that happens, a beautiful event occurs – we get to choose if we want to keep those barriers or change our course.

This is an important point to remember: we are not changing ourselves; we are changing our course of action.

As always, I love to hear your thoughts.

With love,
Maria

How Could You?

June 13, 2013 DrMaria

I remember beginning work on my dissertation in post-graduate school and interviewing faculty as potential committee members for my study. I outlined to them the model of leadership that I wanted to introduce into the great body of knowledge.

After speaking with several professors, one of the deans spoke with me about my leadership model and told me that people wouldn’t understand it, because the word would turn them off. I was shocked!

I was disappointed, and most profoundly, I was disillusioned. How could this word not be discussed in an advanced study of leadership? How could we talk and theorize about motivating and inspiring others without talking about this word?

What did leadership really mean? What did followership really mean, without this word? How could people not be drawn to this word, and even more shocking, how could this word be so powerful as to turn people off? What is this powerful, scary, misunderstood word?

L-O-V-E.

Love! Shocking, isn’t it?

Who’s in?

I am!

With LOVE,
Maria

A Leg up on Legacy

June 11, 2013 DrMaria

We all leave a legacy, whether by choice or unconsciously. So why not intentionally create the legacy? Do you really want someone else to define your legacy? Meaningfulness, is feeling a part of something bigger, as big as a legacy.

The yearning for something more is evident in our society. Work-related illnesses are on the rise, and stress reduction workshops are everywhere. Proof of peoples’ desire for a more spiritual and holistic life is on grocery store shelves, in advertising, and in kitchens and baths across America. Spiritual practices such as yoga, prayer, meditation, and aromatherapy are creeping into offices and boardrooms, which are far from the practices that have guided American businesses since the 18th century. The evidence is out there—we want more!

I invite you to discover a model of leadership that can help you realize meaning, abundance, and can inspire and motivate those around you in meaningful experiences. Let’s be a part of something bigger and let’s start now! Let’s be love-based leaders.

Viva la revolution!

With love,
Maria

The B.S. of Poverty

May 14, 2013 DrMaria

Do not confuse the idea of service with poverty. Ego would have us believe that God demands that everyone must divest himself or herself of every material thing, and that we can only experience heaven if we are poor. This message has been greatly misunderstood… it is B.S.!

When we love money more than we love God, we experience hell. That’s why many wealthy people say they still don’t have happiness. This has nothing to do with money, as money is just an object. It has everything to do with where we place our focus, attention, and love.

Money allows us to serve others in profound ways. Our challenge is that sometimes we put money first instead of love.

We can NEVER fail when we put love and service first. What we need will follow.

With love,
Maria

Social Responsibility Movement

May 9, 2013 DrMaria

Have you noticed the recent emphasis on social responsibility in our business culture? Consumers, employees, and leaders are demanding socially responsible behavior of themselves and others. If companies choose not to comply with our wishes, we go elsewhere—because we can.

We see social responsibility manifested in the philanthropic activities organizations are doing; and they are not just writing checks to non-profits. Companies are building schools, putting shoes on children, and teaching third-world countries how to harvest water. We have business models emerging with the primary purpose of serving others. Guess what? These businesses are making money! They have learned how to connect the heart with the bank account. A Course in Miracles tells us, “If you feel the love of God within you, you will look out on a world of mercy and of love.” That is exactly what some organizations are doing.

We also see the socially responsible movement in organizations manifested as the green movement. Entire global organizations are working their strategic plans to reduce their carbon footprint. Organizations are working with suppliers and manufacturers who share the same service and stewardship values. This is not just a fad or a trend, it is an awakening, a collective consciousness showing up and stepping forward. This collective voice is saying ENOUGH!

If not now, when?

It is time. Are you ready?

With love,
Maria

Not all Power is Created Equal

May 7, 2013 DrMaria

Power is a hot topic. Not all power is equal. Bertram Raven and John French identified five different power bases: legitimate, coercive, expert, reward, and referent.

Legitimate power is the type of power that comes with a title or position. Coercive power is one that imposes force on others, like the king who threatens to behead those who disobey. Expert power is the type of power that comes with knowledge or information that someone else does not have. Reward power comes from bestowing upon someone something of value, and referent power is the power of respect. Like anything else in this world, all forms of power can be for the greater good or for selfish and egoic purpose.

While empowerment may make some leaders nervous, it also makes some followers uncomfortable. In Scenes from Corporate Life, Earl Shorris wrote, “Men who cannot conceive a happiness of their own accept a definition imposed upon them by others.” We have been taught for too long to let others define our thoughts, feelings, jobs, lives, and meaning for us. What to think, what to wear, how to feel—is it any wonder we get nervous when we receive permission or power to design aspects for ourselves?

As leaders, we must teach. We teach and show others how to stand in this power. We invite them in to learn, to grow, to create, and to commit to a purpose greater than our own. When we create and commit to the larger purpose, we seek the greater good. We become a community of we and our instead of me and mine.

What is your best empowerment experience? I love to hear from you.

With love,
Maria

Love, Love, Love

May 2, 2013 DrMaria

Love of Self, Love of Source, and Love of Others (the love-based leadership model) all require love, trust, and commitment to growth and development in the workplace. If trust and love are not ever-present, then fear-based decisions will result. “For centuries the human species has been discovering that it is the creator of its own reality, making the discovery, and retreating from it in disappointment (because the wizard [referring to the Wizard of Oz story] is not what we expected) and in fear (because the freedom the discovery brings is unknown and terrifying).”1. Fear is powerful; so powerful that it alone creates a false reality of that which is feared in the first place. Victor Frankl illustrates, “It is characteristic of this fear that it produces precisely that of which the patient is afraid…the wish is father to the thought…the fear is mother to the event.”2. Once again, choice is everywhere, calling for a decision between choosing love to guide us or fear to guide us. “Man is not born slave or free, but creates himself as one or the other through free or voluntary action.”3.

Fear, again, holds us back from achieving so much. We are afraid to show that we care, afraid to open our hearts, and afraid that we may appear vulnerable. The irony in this is that when we really care about the individuals we lead, love multiplies. When people know, see, and feel that you care—they do the same. “Love really does keep on giving.”4.

With love,
Maria

1. Walter Truett Anderson, Reality Isn't What it Used to Be (New York: HarperCollins Publishers, 1990), p. 29.
2. Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning, p. 125
3. Madan Sarup, An Introduction Guide to Post-structuralism and Postmodernism (Athens, GA: University of Georgia Press, 1993), p. 18.
4. Lee G. Bolman and Terrence E. Deal, Leading with Soul, p. 88.

Oh No, He Didn’t!

April 30, 2013 DrMaria

I am almost embarrassed by the fact that while I knew forgiveness intellectually, I didn't really learn the heart-lesson until 10 years ago when I had a great learning experience regarding forgiveness. My mentor, a consultant hired by our corporate office, leveraged the difficulty in the relationship I had with our division general manager to his advantage. By indicating that he was still needed beyond his contract because the division general manager and I were not getting along, he prolonged his lucrative consultant income.

I was eventually relieved of my managerial role so the consultant could continue his monthly visit to manage and lead my department. I was deeply hurt and profoundly resentful. I became exhausted carrying this load of pain and then I finally realized that holding this anger was not honoring or serving anyone, least of all, me.

After reconnecting with my spirit, I knew that I had to forgive him. The next time he was in town, I apologized for my behavior and told him that I forgave him for his part in reinforcing the wedge between the divisional general manager and me. The immediate sensation I had was lightness. I could hardly believe how physically light I felt. I was nearly giddy with delight and wondered what had taken me so long to get there.

“Forgiveness corrects the misperception that we are separate from each other, and allows us to experience a sense of unity and at-one-ment with each other.”1.

With love,
Maria

1. Gerald G. Jampolsky, M.D., Love is Letting Go of Fear, p. 66

Sleeping Sickness of the Soul

April 25, 2013 DrMaria

As with your mind and body, it is important to take care of your soul. Nurture your soul with love, kindness, and depth. When we do not care for our souls, we end up with what Albert Schweitzer referred to as, “A sleeping sickness of the soul. Its symptoms are loss of seriousness, enthusiasm, and zest. When we live superficially, pursue no goals deeper than material success, and never stop to listen to our inner voices, we stunt our spiritual development.”1.

How do you develop your spirit? Spiritual growth and development manifest through inspiration. Do what you love and you’ll find that you love what you do. Music, art, nature, and literature are a few of the paths for inspiration. What stirs your soul? For me, when I hear drumming—Native American drumming, Irish drumming, Kudo drumming, or nearly any type of drumming—my soul stirs. Looking at a beautiful sunset feeds my soul. When I listen to music that feeds the souls of musicians, it nourishes my soul. Watching cloud formations or the dance of a butterfly warms my soul. “Spirituality transcends the ordinary; and yet, paradoxically, it can be found only in the ordinary. Spirituality is beyond us and yet is in everything we do. It is extraordinary, and yet it is extraordinarily simple.”2.

Listening to and honoring your heart’s call honors your soul, your core, and your very essence. When we are aligned with our soul, with our spirit, we are authentic, abundant, and at peace. Meaning is not a destination, but a way of life, like the air we breathe. There is no better way to achieve well being and love for ourselves than aligning with our spirit.

With love,
Maria

1. Albert Schweitzer quoted by Phillip L. Berman, The Search for Meaning: Americans Talk About What They Believe and Why (New York: Ballantine, 1990), p. vi.
2. Ernest Kurtz and Katherine Ketcham, The Spirituality of Imperfection: Modern Wisdom from Classic Stories (New York: Bantam, 1992), p. 35.

The Stories We Tell

April 18, 2013 DrMaria

Perceptions are the stories we tell ourselves regarding what we see and how we interpret the world around us. Les Brown, one of the great 21st century storytellers said, “How people live their lives is as a result of the stories that they believe about themselves,” What are your stories? Do they serve you as your aspire to reach your highest potential? Do your stories lift you up or do they bring you down? Do your stories represent who you really are, your true essence?

Let’s look at a possible story: If you greeted someone in the morning at work and he or she did not return your greeting, what would you think? Are they mad at you? Do you wonder all morning what you may have said to tick them off? Do you toss and turn that night because you fear that it was when you laughed too loudly at something they said two weeks ago that you thought was a joke, but it turned out it wasn’t? Or what if the answer is simply that they didn’t return your greeting because they didn’t hear you. Alternatively, perhaps they were distracted replaying a discussion they had with their teenager last night. What are the stories that you tell yourself? These skewed perceptions sabotage our relationships with others and our relationship with our self. If your stories no longer resonate with who you are, it is time to create a new story. Change your perception and you change your world.

The uncomplicated beauty in this lesson is that by standing in awareness and looking at our beliefs and thoughts, we can simply make a choice to keep them or release them. When we release those beliefs and thoughts that no longer serve us, we take back our power from fear to love, from negativity to positivity, from ego to Spirit. We see and understand perceptions and stand in our power to change those beliefs to experience miraculous shifts in our reality, lives, and work.

What story do you tell? Does is serve you or drain you? Please share your insights!

With love,
Maria

Leadership and the Nature of Balance

April 4, 2013 DrMaria

I know there is quite of bit of talk going around about balance. Unfortunately, the discussion only seems to pile on guilt because many of us are already aware that we are out of balance. The purpose of this post is not to engender guilt, but to help a miracle come into your life with awareness and practical strategies to regain order and balance.

Let’s look to nature for our lesson in balance. Nature teaches us about seasons. Our life also has seasons. Sometimes our seasons are busy, other times our seasons may offer renewal, and sometimes, our seasons may call for hibernation. Seasons do not go on forever—there is always a change of season. Listen and learn this lesson from nature: you cannot indefinitely go on at a frenetic pace by sheer adrenaline; it is unnatural and could be extremely dangerous to you.

Nature also teaches us that unless we shed the old way, we cannot begin anew. This is nature’s miracle—shifting. A caterpillar shifts to a butterfly, and the snake sheds its skin. We cannot move forward and look for something new if we don’t let go of the old; and we cannot experience the miracle of a different perspective or idea if we hold on to old and limiting beliefs.

We spend a lot of time in leadership and management seminars discussing how to prioritize. Many of us have handled this lesson fairly well at work; but we forget the idea of adding balance to this equation. Like the balance of seasons, we can work at a fast pace for a while, meeting deadlines and seizing opportunities. Without looking at the bigger picture, however, we could end-up spinning our wheels on the perceived priority and everything else goes to pot. That is where order comes into play. Without order, we will continue to drop things, even with our priority list.

Let’s use this time to “Spring Clean” and create order for this season of Spring. Spring clean your mind of limiting beliefs and your physical space of clutter.

With love,
Maria

Love-Based Leadership

February 26, 2013 DrMaria

As we close out this month of Love, let’s look at how we can translate that into a love-based leadership model. In my book, Love-Based Leadership: Transform Your Life with Meaning and Abundance, I present a very simple, yet profound way to lead based on three pillars: Love of Self, Love of Source, and Love of Others.

Leading with the Love-Based Leadership (LBL) model, we find meaning, authenticity, value, abundance, and purpose in and through our leadership. Those we lead find motivation, creativity, loyalty, commitment to the task, and value in their jobs through meaning.

Many of us share the common desire to find meaning in our daily work. A leadership model based on love recognizes the importance of living holistically by integrating love, health, wellness, and spirituality into all aspects of our life.

When we lead with the three pillars, we first focus on Love of Self. This is not an egoic love, but rather one where we honor, care for, and respect our self. While developing this pillar, we look to develop:

Intuition
Truth-telling
Truth-receiving
Leverage the power of choice
Perception-shifting
Presence
Health & wellness

When we incorporate the second pillar into our leadership, Love of Source, we seek to connect with our Source. This connection fuels:

Inspiration
Creativity
Happiness
Faith
Perseverance
Peace
Love

In the third pillar, Love of Others, our leadership expands outward to include family, community, and our organization. This practice creates:

Forgiveness
Knowledge creation
Learning cultures
Shared ownership
Shared power
Collaboration
Meaning

Shifting from fear to love is transformative. This shift will not only transform your organization; it will transform your life.

With love,
Maria

Culture Creation – Part 4 of 4: The Deepest Element

February 21, 2013 DrMaria

As we conclude this exploration of organizational cultures, we go to the deepest part. Values, like beliefs, are elements extremely important to us, but we are not aware of them until we face a situation that forces them into our consciousness. Integrity, honesty, and ethical beliefs are a few values that often drive organizational and ethical behaviors.

As a coach, I usually begin a coaching relationship with a values clarification exercise. Values are foundational elements to the ways we think, act, and behave. Organizations are coming into awareness about the importance of value identification and are creating value statements to guide the organization. These value statements are as important as the mission and vision statements.

The deepest elements we find below the surface of the tree are the assumptions that feed the entire person and organization, passing through each element all the way through the roots, trunk, and branches to the tips of the leaves. Our assumptions are the most deeply ingrained of all the elements, created by our mental models.

Mental models are the lenses or filters by which we view the world, and no two are alike. Comprised of our familial, educational, community, religious, personal, and professional experiences, our mental models help us make sense, assumptions, and judgments about our life experiences. For example if I said, “pop” what would you think? Some may think of their father, a loud noise, a gun, gum, or soda. Whatever you thought of is reflective of your mental model.

So how do we create a culture based on love and love-based leadership? We start with the roots and work our way up. We begin with awareness and make conscious, strategic choices to create an environment based on love and not on fear. We recognize our own mental models and broaden our beliefs. We wrap awareness around our values and deepen our understanding of how they affect our beliefs and behaviors. We strategically infuse our organizational culture with continued learning and development. We intentionally instill a sense of shared ownership and power in the work we do, providing channels for meaningful work experiences, and we wrap all of these strategies in love.

As always, I love it when you share your insights.

With love,
Maria