5 Steps For Working With Uncertainty →

Join me at http://www.DrMariaChurch.com/drmariatv/ where the discussion continues. We expect leaders, including ourselves, to have the answers. If we don't h...

We expect leaders, including ourselves, to have the answers.

If we don’t have the answer to a leadership challenge, we may feel inadequate. These feelings, like inadequacy, may also include feelings of uncertainty and vulnerability. None of these feelings feel good to us, nor are allowed in the workplace, or so we’ve been taught.

Really? Are we really supposed to never experience uncertainty as a leader? We are human beings, “hard-wired for struggle” as researcher, Brené Brown states. We are not the Hollywood version of leaders —we are human. And with our humanness, we are sometimes—make that many times, uncertain. What do we do with this uncertainty? Well, we bury it of course.

This strategy may work for us for a while, that is until it shows up again as illness, ulcers, or worse. Why do you think we are so stressed, obese, and addicted? It is because we bury and numb our feelings. We’ve become comfortably numb.The interesting thing about numbing is that when we numb our “bad” feelings such as uncertainty, vulnerability, doubt, and fear, we are also numbing our “good” feelings of joy, peace, and gratitude.Another important aspect to know about uncertainty and vulnerability is that this state is where creativity, joy, and beauty are found.

This is the place where great art is created. Walking through the door of uncertainty and vulnerability is full of endless possibilities because this is the location of our true, authentic self. How do we work with uncertainty and vulnerability without going crazy? Follow these five steps to support you during the uncertain times:

1. Embrace uncertainty and vulnerability. Reach into it and pull up and out all of the fear, anxiety, and doubt. Burying and numbing will only allow it to surface again, so lean in, feel those feelings, and then release.

2. Stay present. Don’t worry about the future or live in the past. The only moment you have is the present one, so why waste it?

3. Stay in your own lane. When we start to compare ourselves to others, we set ourselves up for failure, not because we can’t be as successful as someone else, but because we can’t BE anyone else. What I can be is the best version of me, and what you can be is the best, highest self you can be.

4. Practice gratitude. Nothing else will bring you into the present faster than gratitude.

5. Be loving and truthful with yourself and with others.

Remember that uncertainty and vulnerability is the birthplace of truth, authenticity, creativity, and beauty.

When was a time you were uncertain and did it anyway?

I would love to hear from you!

With love,

Maria

Interested in becoming an Irresistible Leader? Click HERE.

Leadership Effectiveness Requires Laughter

Early on in my corporate career, colleagues advised me to learn golf, which they claimed as a great way to network, bond with clients, and create deals. I learned the sport, but I didn’t enjoy the game as much as other people did.

At one of our corporate retreats, my boss and colleagues couldn’t wait to get out on the course with some of the top executive staff. I was a bit confused by this because I knew my boss didn’t really like or get along with this group of people.

I asked him about it and he said that on the golf course, unless you are a pro, there is no pretense; all are on equal footing and all are hitting poorly. The golf experience allowed them to bring down their guards and share the misery of their poor shots. Like golf, laughter allows us to connect with one another, letting our guards down, sans the misery of poor golf shots.Laughter enhances communication by letting our shields down and showing that we are human.

The model of professionalism for too long has instructed us to be super-human. We learned how to work beyond what is humanly possible, denying our natural rhythm for balance. We also learned to check our emotions at the door.While I ascribe to the concepts of emotional intelligence (EI), we are still human; we have emotions. To deny that fact is insanity. EI purports that we understand and acknowledge our emotions, recognize them, and with conscious awareness not let the emotions rule us. This is certainly a healthy approach to emotions, which is very different from the professional corporate model we learned.Here are seven strategies for infusing laughter and lightness in your leadership and life:

• Start developing your practice of laughter with consciously smiling today. See how many people you can touch and shift their energy with your smile.

• Begin your meetings on a light note. I have the E*Trade babies’ videos on my favorites list and would start meetings with one or two of those commercials. The more I watch them, the funnier they are.

• Watch a funny movie, making note of the elements that tickle your funny bone.

• Listen to a funny tape on the way to work, setting the tone for the day.

• Laugh for 3–5 minutes every day. Fake it ‘til you make it!

• Commit to do one silly thing a day to cultivate your playfulness.

• Start collecting stories from work that are funny; invite everyone to participate and present these stories at the annual holiday party.

What do you do to infuse laughter into your life?

With love and laughter,

Maria

P.S. This is an excerpt from my book!